Things Lately

     Life has been somewhat unpredictable recently and as a result, I've been having trouble keeping up.  "An old flame" popped up in my life recently, while another fling fizzled out.  My best friend came home from school for a day this past weekend and we didn't hang out, which was very unusual for us.  I swallowed my pride and spoke to an old friend who betrayed and manipulated me, but still thinks that I am the bad guy in this situation somehow.  These things, though unexpected, were not necessarily stressful and I could not understand why I was suddenly feeling so poorly.
     Then I realized that the week leading up to September twenty-fifth in particular always causes me to go a little crazy.  I have a somewhat poor immune system anyway but when my stress level increases, I start feeling ill and my skin always goes berserk. I stress eat or eat nothing for days, I work out longer and harder than usual, and my sleep pattern becomes erratic, if existent at all.  This is about to get really personal and somewhat cheesy toward the end, so fair warning.

     My father's birthday is September twenty-fifth.  My father taught sociology and theology at several colleges and universities in the Boston area.  He collected beer bottles, which still line the shelves of our outdoor shed.  He liked Kenny Loggins and was a New York Giants fan (He grew up in New Jersey, don't judge him too harshly).  He loved to laugh.

     He dedicated his life to helping people and bettering communities.  He was founder of a community development corporation and a member of its board of directors for five years. During that same time, he founded and was executive director of an organization that helped renovate a housing development in dire need of repairs, established educational and social programs, and initiated conflict resolution classes and community events for over a thousand residents.  He, my mother and two of their friends (a social worker, a veterinarian, a writer and a lawyer respectively) taught night classes in makeshift classrooms for almost two years in order for residents of the development to get their GEDs and become hired.  He ran for for some sort of political office at one point, always fighting for someone treated unfairly.  He constantly had a new project to take on, a new battle to fight.
     My parents and I did everything together.  We went hiking and canoeing.  One time my dad took me fishing and I fell out of the boat.  My mother came home to find piles of wet clothing leading all the way upstairs to the bathtub.  My dad just looked at her guiltily and she knew what happened.  Fortunately for him, she laughed.

     They grew up in the same neighborhood as children.  My dad originally had a crush on my mom's friend and when my mom found out she informed her friend that he was an idiot.  One snowy afternoon, my mom took my dad's hat off, smashed a snowball on top of his head, and put his hat back on.  Fast forward two years later and they started dating.  My parents married four years later when my mom was twenty - my current age.  It's a little strange to think about, getting married and settling down at my age.  They moved from New Jersey to Massachusetts and my family has lived in the same house ever since.

     My father passed away when I was only three years old.  He was forty-one when he passed away from colon cancer.  It was just my mom and I for a while after that and we grew incredibly close as a result.
     I don't talk about my dad very often.  As I get older, it's gotten a little easier to talk about him, without the funny stories sounding so depressing.  I do find though, that as the years pass by, the memories I have of him are growing fainter and fainter.  I miss him.  I realize now that he's the reason why I want to help people and I am now more convinced than ever that changing majors is the right choice.  

Happy birthday, Dad. ♥