Bird Song
People always want to touch my tattoo. I can't explain it; they think it's okay to touch my body - just to make sure it's real. Thank goodness it's on my shoulder and not somewhere else...
People also always ask what it means. I used to lie and say I got it "just because" (They are usually less than satisfied with that answer). In a sense, it is the truth; I did originally get it simply because I wanted to. The seven birds on my chest/collar bone area are connected to/related to a book (as if anything else). I feel comfortable and confident enough to admit it's actually a young adults' novel: Divergent by Veronica Roth.
If you're unfamiliar with the book, it's the tale of a girl named Beatrice (Tris), who lives in a Dystopian society where the population is divided into different groups based on values. At the age of sixteen, children are tested and allowed to choose which group, or "faction", they would like to pledge their life to: Erudite (the Intelligent), Abnegation (The Selfless), Amity (the Peaceful), Candor (the Honest) or Dauntless (the Brave). Those who are tested and score in more than one faction are referred to as "Divergent". At the ceremony, Tris chooses a faction separate from her brother and parents. In leaving them behind, Tris struggles with her identity as an individual, as well as the strong bond she feels for her family. As Divergent, she feels lost and somewhat that she doesn't have any one place she truly belongs.
This book came to me during a very dark time in my life when I was searching for a sign that I mattered in this world. I was a freshman in college, miserable as a commuter because I felt alone. I was trapped between worlds: high school and college, home and school. All of my high school friends had moved away to school and I was left behind with a broken heart from an ended relationship and a horrible feeling of abandonment by my friends. The worst part of all, I think, was that I told myself I had chosen this path. You have chosen this life - this loneliness, I said to myself. Everything I was feeling: afraid, frustrated, impulsive, rebellious, wistful, confused, conflicted...and lonely - it all added up to a spur of the moment road trip to Rhode Island one afternoon with a friend and a tattoo etched into my skin.
I had been wanting a tattoo for a while, but with no idea what to get and I was not about to foolishly get any random thing permanently drawn on my body. My friend was scrolling through the internet when I came across a photo on Tumblr, this one actually:
It spoke to me. Somehow, deep down inside of me, I felt this strange connection, that it longed to be a part of me. So I got the tattoo. I had thought about three birds like the picture. Something told me seven was more fitting, one for each of the people who profoundly affected me in my life, but I lost. People like my father. My paternal grandfather, Donald. My neighbor, Cheryl, who treated me like a daughter. Bob A., a family friend who always took the time to play with me as a child and added special powder to the fireplace to make the flames change color. They were just some of the people I was blessed to know, who had molded and shaped my life. These were people whom I loved with all my heart until they were cruelly ripped from my life. Some people think it's silly that I got the tattoo so impulsively, and at the time, I too questioned if I had made a stupid decision. Then came the book.
I came across it in Barnes and Noble about two months later. I was poking around, looking for something new when I noticed this book on a "New Arrivals" display. I bought and devoured the entire book in a matter of hours. Not only did I love the plot, the characters, the language and the emotional responses it evoked in me, but it was also the sign I had been waiting for.
I've struggled with my belief/doubt in God, but I've always been a firm believer in signs. I'm not exactly sure who or what sends these signs, but I have found that when I'm looking for answers, something always pops up to tell me which direction to choose. In the Divergent, Tris gets three ravens tattooed above her collarbone, one for each other the family members she was forced to leave behind. I knew immediately that the ravens Tris had gotten were an affirmation that I had made the right decision. For a book that impacted me as severely as Divergent did, it only validated everything I felt, everything I knew deep down.
Bird tattoos suddenly became all the rage and hipster-esque thanks to Tumblr (I had mine before they became hipster and popular haha). It's not inspired by the book, for I had gotten it long before it ever came across my radar. I have no regrets though. I firmly believe deep down in my soul that my tattoo is part of me. I had no idea what those birds would end up meaning, or that I would ever find such a book. Though it didn't make sense to me at the time, it turned out that I was actually meant to get it.
People also always ask what it means. I used to lie and say I got it "just because" (They are usually less than satisfied with that answer). In a sense, it is the truth; I did originally get it simply because I wanted to. The seven birds on my chest/collar bone area are connected to/related to a book (as if anything else). I feel comfortable and confident enough to admit it's actually a young adults' novel: Divergent by Veronica Roth.
If you're unfamiliar with the book, it's the tale of a girl named Beatrice (Tris), who lives in a Dystopian society where the population is divided into different groups based on values. At the age of sixteen, children are tested and allowed to choose which group, or "faction", they would like to pledge their life to: Erudite (the Intelligent), Abnegation (The Selfless), Amity (the Peaceful), Candor (the Honest) or Dauntless (the Brave). Those who are tested and score in more than one faction are referred to as "Divergent". At the ceremony, Tris chooses a faction separate from her brother and parents. In leaving them behind, Tris struggles with her identity as an individual, as well as the strong bond she feels for her family. As Divergent, she feels lost and somewhat that she doesn't have any one place she truly belongs.
This book came to me during a very dark time in my life when I was searching for a sign that I mattered in this world. I was a freshman in college, miserable as a commuter because I felt alone. I was trapped between worlds: high school and college, home and school. All of my high school friends had moved away to school and I was left behind with a broken heart from an ended relationship and a horrible feeling of abandonment by my friends. The worst part of all, I think, was that I told myself I had chosen this path. You have chosen this life - this loneliness, I said to myself. Everything I was feeling: afraid, frustrated, impulsive, rebellious, wistful, confused, conflicted...and lonely - it all added up to a spur of the moment road trip to Rhode Island one afternoon with a friend and a tattoo etched into my skin.
I had been wanting a tattoo for a while, but with no idea what to get and I was not about to foolishly get any random thing permanently drawn on my body. My friend was scrolling through the internet when I came across a photo on Tumblr, this one actually:
It spoke to me. Somehow, deep down inside of me, I felt this strange connection, that it longed to be a part of me. So I got the tattoo. I had thought about three birds like the picture. Something told me seven was more fitting, one for each of the people who profoundly affected me in my life, but I lost. People like my father. My paternal grandfather, Donald. My neighbor, Cheryl, who treated me like a daughter. Bob A., a family friend who always took the time to play with me as a child and added special powder to the fireplace to make the flames change color. They were just some of the people I was blessed to know, who had molded and shaped my life. These were people whom I loved with all my heart until they were cruelly ripped from my life. Some people think it's silly that I got the tattoo so impulsively, and at the time, I too questioned if I had made a stupid decision. Then came the book.
I came across it in Barnes and Noble about two months later. I was poking around, looking for something new when I noticed this book on a "New Arrivals" display. I bought and devoured the entire book in a matter of hours. Not only did I love the plot, the characters, the language and the emotional responses it evoked in me, but it was also the sign I had been waiting for.
I've struggled with my belief/doubt in God, but I've always been a firm believer in signs. I'm not exactly sure who or what sends these signs, but I have found that when I'm looking for answers, something always pops up to tell me which direction to choose. In the Divergent, Tris gets three ravens tattooed above her collarbone, one for each other the family members she was forced to leave behind. I knew immediately that the ravens Tris had gotten were an affirmation that I had made the right decision. For a book that impacted me as severely as Divergent did, it only validated everything I felt, everything I knew deep down.
Bird tattoos suddenly became all the rage and hipster-esque thanks to Tumblr (I had mine before they became hipster and popular haha). It's not inspired by the book, for I had gotten it long before it ever came across my radar. I have no regrets though. I firmly believe deep down in my soul that my tattoo is part of me. I had no idea what those birds would end up meaning, or that I would ever find such a book. Though it didn't make sense to me at the time, it turned out that I was actually meant to get it.
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